Someone please invent a remote control with a built-in phone so I can call it and find the fucker.
4:08 PM Dec 8th via txt
Why has it taken me 10 weeks to notice that Jamie looks like Quagmire from Family Guy? #apprentice
10:00 PM Dec 8th via web
Sleb Spot: Christan Cooke, Barbican. Nipples not visible.
7:12 PM Dec 9th via txt
@merseytart His voice was being badly dubbed by someone else.
7:18 PM Dec 9th via txt
Sleb Spot: Dead Bradley off Eastenders, also at Barbican.
7:30 PM Dec 9th via txt
Sleb Spot: Natalia Tena (Tonks from Harry Potter) Moorgate Tube.
10:24 PM Dec 9th via txt
Mad traffic at North Greenwich - a JLS concert just ended at the O2.
10:43 PM Dec 9th via txt
Last night's #misfits - let's face it, the gorilla was Series 2's "talking dog" moment, wasn't it?
10 December 2010 17:31:15 via web
During The Event's ad breaks I'm circling my Xmas viewing in the Radio Times.
10 December 2010 21:29:20 via txt
@K8Wilding I'm still on the 21st so it's not got exciting yet. At least, I assume it gets exciting at some point.
10 December 2010 21:33:46 via txt
So, do Wallace and Gromit own Christmas now? Radio Times cover *and* the stamps. And BBC idents a couple of years ago...
11 December 2010 11:34:15 via web
Dear the Tricycle, Filter's Twelfth Night was not universally acclaimed. I didn't acclaim it, nor did the other theatre blogger I know.
11 December 2010 16:31:07 via web
And so begins FOUR HOURS of #xfactor this weekend. *hangs self*
11 December 2010 19:00:27 via web
"I find it hard to find the words." So, forming a sentence: Latest in the list of things Cheryl can't do. #xfactor
11 December 2010 19:33:13 via web
Haha, love Louis' not-so-subtle "what the fuck are you still doing here?" #xfactor
11 December 2010 20:00:16 via web
"I don't wanna do this anymore." Thank fuck we're agreed on something at last Matt. #xfactor
11 December 2010 20:06:08 via web
"Rihanna really wanted to duet with Matt. She knew how much she was going to pwn him." #xfactor
11 December 2010 20:08:40 via web
*crosses fingers for Rebecca / Cilla duet* Honkathon. #xfactor
11 December 2010 20:10:12 via web
It's good how these duets aren't PAINFULLY UNDER-REHEARSED or anything. #xfactor
11 December 2010 20:13:10 via web
"We all admire him. Because he managed to escape his boyband and get a solo career, just like we all want to." #xfactor
11 December 2010 20:19:49 via web
Where is the love? Ungrateful little cow, the judges have been writing your name on their pencil cases all series, there's the love #xfactor
11 December 2010 20:27:37 via web
"Matt has the voice of an angel. Specifically, the Archangel Michael, Bringer of Bad News." #xfactor
11 December 2010 20:32:18 via web
Rihanna's killing two birds with one stone - performing *and* getting a gynaecological exam at the same time. #xfactor
11 December 2010 20:36:55 via web
BBC2 are being very cost-effective, they've used the same Xmas idents for the last three years.
11 December 2010 22:16:10 via web
I keep seeing people on t'internet describing Rebecca as "flawless." Which I guess she is, apart from all her flaws. #xfactor
12 December 2010 19:29:09 via web
"You can't help thinking how big are these guys gonna be?" Well just wait and see Cheryl, they're not done growing yet. #xfactor
12 December 2010 19:41:24 via web
"We know that Louis can sing." HOW? HOW DO WE KNOW THIS? #xfactor
8:07 PM Dec 12th via web
Sweet Dreams. Some people dream they can fly. Rebecca dreams she can walk. #xfactor
8:11 PM Dec 12th via web
Poor the Rebecca, nobody wants to bake her face into their dinner. #xfactor
8:16 PM Dec 12th via web
Don't cheer the word "is," silly audience people. #xfactor
8:30 PM Dec 12th via web
Bloody hell, did Cowell actually sound a bit like his emotion might be *gasp* genuine? #xfactor
8:35 PM Dec 12th via web
Oh good, it's been ages since we were reminded Rebecca has NO CONFIDENCE. #xfactor
8:56 PM Dec 12th via web
Dermot, don't ask Rebecca complicated questions like "what's your favourite memory from the show?" #xfactor
8:59 PM Dec 12th via web
Can Stacey not just win retrospectively please? #xfactor
9:21 PM Dec 12th via web
"You've got work to do now Matt." "WHAT? I DON'T DO WORK!" #xfactor
9:24 PM Dec 12th via web
So a white male has won the X Factor. Good, because that's always been a recipe for chart success in the past. #xfactor
9:31 PM Dec 12th via web
"Beyonce. The first fragrance from Beyonce." I wish I knew where these perfume-naming people got their ideas from.
9:34 PM Dec 12th via web
A sitcom idea is percolating. If I co-opt the personality of anyone reading this for a character, er, well sorry in advance.
3:50 PM Dec 14th via web
If I *don't* put you in my sitcom don't worry, it just means you're TOO BORING. Just so you know.
3:52 PM Dec 14th via web
@pretinama Is Milton Keynes not, then, the adrenalin capital of Europe? Was I misinformed?
5:10 PM Dec 14th via txt