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So anyway,
Because what the Net really needs is another person sharing his uninformed views
Twitterball 25: A sign language interpreter gets her groove on 
5th-Sep-2012 02:34 pm
This week on my Twitter feed the Paralympics start, and I actually get round to going to see an event.

Totty Wednesday: OH COME ON! You just keep scratching your stomach deliberately so your T-shirt rides up and I get the vapours.
1:31 PM - 29 Aug 12

So... no Google doodle for the #plympics?
2:47 PM - 29 Aug 12

Oh crap. Cameron's at the #plympics. Looks like we're winning fuck all this year.
8:08 PM - 29 Aug 12

Bah, I wanted Hawking to burst out of the Moon #plympics
8:31 PM - 29 Aug 12

I'm surprised Jon Bausor didn't reconfigure the stadium into a thrust #plympics #incrediblyobscuretheatricaljokes
8:38 PM - 29 Aug 12

The Tempest is becoming the Emeli Sande of plays, that's three ceremonies out of three. #plympics
8:39 PM - 29 Aug 12

Going by the outfits, I'm assuming this section is a tribute to Colin Baker era Doctor Who #plympics
8:44 PM - 29 Aug 12

Queen turns up herself this time. "Er, yeah, we thought maybe not Harry this time, eh? Oh, no reason." #plympics
8:46 PM - 29 Aug 12

Face it, EVEN THE QUEEN doesn't know this bloody second verse of the National Anthem. #plympics
8:51 PM - 29 Aug 12

And now, as is traditional, the opening ceremony's tribute to cars and cheap travel websites. #plympics
8:53 PM - 29 Aug 12

So... either Greece sent nobody or Channel 4 showed adverts instead of the first few athletes? #plympics
8:54 PM - 29 Aug 12

Suddenly changing commentary team? Did someone yell "for god's sake someone shut Krishnan up?" #plympics
9:20 PM - 29 Aug 12

Thanks for the cheery aside, Jon #plympics
9:24 PM - 29 Aug 12

Jon Snow really can't switch off the newsreader, can he? "Look at the colourful costumes!" "Yes, but what's their GDP?" #plympics
9:28 PM - 29 Aug 12

"We're not talking about recession or anything depressing like on the news." Well, WE'RE not, Jon. #plympics
9:32 PM - 29 Aug 12

Right, so Greece *don't* go first in the #plympics. We still nearly didn't get them though BECAUSE WE NEED TO BUY MORE STUFF! #plympics
9:37 PM - 29 Aug 12

Cutting away from #plympics for "put this cream on your horribly disfiguring wrinkles!" #senseofperspective
9:40 PM - 29 Aug 12

@MrAlFox I'm still waiting for Wenlock to regenerate into Mandeville.
10:04 PM - 29 Aug 12

Seriously, Krishnan? *I* bloody knew Oscar Pistorius was the SA flagbearer, you really should have. #plympics
10:27 PM - 29 Aug 12

I'm taking C4 cutting away from Team USA as revenge for NBC cutting the 7/7 tribute from the Olympics. #lympics
10:46 PM - 29 Aug 12

Princess Anne unsuccessfully trying to get Will'n'Kate to be impressed by her ability to wave a flag. #plympics
10:49 PM - 29 Aug 12

Oh do try to look like you give a shit, SamCam #plympics
10:54 PM - 29 Aug 12

I do like when a sign language interpreter gets her groove on. This tune'll be packing dancefloors in Ibeefa next summer, clearly #plympics
11:00 PM - 29 Aug 12

11:01 PM - 29 Aug 12

"...and now the Gladiators are... rrrrrrrrrrrrready!" #plympics
11:05 PM - 29 Aug 12

Not that I don't love the "petal" cauldron, but I thought we were getting a new one for the #plympics?
11:18 PM - 29 Aug 12

Has Serena been stuck under that brolly all this time? Nice to see he kept his Widow Twanky costume, mind. #plympics
11:24 PM - 29 Aug 12

Instead of "hoping" everyone at home would have an apple to hand, maybe the artistic directors could have, I dunno, told us to? #plympics
11:43 PM - 29 Aug 12

So... that godawful tower finally has a purpose? #plympics
11:58 PM - 29 Aug 12

OK, now these fireworks I *can* see from my window. #plympics
12:05 AM - 30 Aug 12

"Safe journey home. PS the tube closes in 20 minutes. RUN!" #plympics
12:11 AM - 30 Aug 12

#plympics opening ceremony album's on sale on iTunes; funnily enough, Dame Beverley Knight's "I Am What I Am" is the most downloaded track.
12:16 PM - 30 Aug 12

If The Magistrate is John Lithgow's "London stage debut," how come I saw him on stage in London 3 years ago? Do one-man shows not count?
4:52 PM - 30 Aug 12

Carousel, it transpires, is "Domestic Abuse Is Fun For All The Family: The Musical"
11:07 PM - 30 Aug 12

"Sometimes you can be hit hard and it feels like a kiss." #actuallinefromaclassicmusical
11:10 PM - 30 Aug 12

Yes, I think I can get behind Gethin Anthony being cast in the RSC's winter season #andwhenisaygetbehind #fnar
12:33 PM - 31 Aug 12

There's a plane flying around Brighton with a banner saying "Louise will you marry me?" And another with a banner saying "No." #imaybelying
1:02 PM - 1 Sep 12

Feeling very full. Despite the fact that it was a vegetarian restaurant.
5:35 PM - 1 Sep 12

I liked the mislead, but I think I liked the mislead I *thought* we'd got more (I thought Amy was a goner 5 episodes early) #doctorwho
8:16 PM - 1 Sep 12

So it's the rule now that if the #xfactor audience screams 'cause someone's vaguely pretty, the judges assume he can sing & put him through?
8:32 PM - 1 Sep 12

I predict a generic pub singer being called "very unique." Call me psychic. #xfactor
8:50 PM - 1 Sep 12

Just recorded @ayultp - subject was Troilus & Cressida, so basically 20 minutes of me ranting incoherently. (Yes, like every week, thanks.)
7:04 PM - 2 Sep 12

@lorannah I made a point of mentioning WHY people are walking out. They're not offended, it's not gone over their heads, THEY'RE JUST BORED!
7:09 PM - 2 Sep 12

Oh bless Dame Clare Balding getting star-struck & jealous that Iwan Thomas got a tweet from Oscar Pistorius. #plympics
7:13 PM - 2 Sep 12

Oscar not entirely gracious at being beaten by a Brazilian called Alan. A Brazilian called Alan. #plympics
9:48 PM - 2 Sep 12

A drama degree can make your life weird years later. I once directed one of the commentators on that Pistorius race #plympics
9:54 PM - 2 Sep 12

OK, I *did* have the #plympics on the gym TV, but then Katie Price turned up. So music channel it is.
9:07 AM - 3 Sep 12

I wonder who arbitrarily decided that Arthur Wing Pinero would be the next playwright to get a random revival.
1:07 PM - 3 Sep 12

New Philip Ridley family play at Southwark for Xmas: http://southwarkplayhouse.co.uk/main-house/feathers-in-the-snow/ … Apparently features a devious dolphin.
12:54 PM - 4 Sep 12

After a couple of attempts, I got to Tower Bridge when the Agitos was down the other day.
1:32 PM - 4 Sep 12

I'm on a ski lift. Sorry, I mean I'm on an *Emirates* ski lift.
4:03 PM - 4 Sep 12

Taking my seat behind the TV crews for wheelchair fencing #plympics
5:01 PM - 4 Sep 12

Well the announcer's cute, so that's a start #wheelchairfencing #plympics
5:36 PM - 4 Sep 12

If Mum gets any more excited about #wheelchairfencing she's going to fall off her chair #plympics
7:35 PM - 4 Sep 12

The Hong Kong girl's screaming so loudly, she should be playing tennis #wheelchairfencing #plympics
7:37 PM - 4 Sep 12

Gold for shouty Hong Kong girl! #wheelchairfencing #plympics
7:47 PM - 4 Sep 12
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